Welcome to the continuation of our monthly discussion on the power of solitude. If this is your first article in the series, please make sure you see the previous ones, so you can get the full detail of our discussion, this month.
Personally, I never really spent so much time alone since I was a child in Nigeria and this is because as a young person, there were always people around me. It was when I came to Italy, with none of my family members living with me that I first started to understand the whole concept of solitude. It’s not only about the responsibility of providing for yourself and planning ahead for your future.
The entire idea of what kind of future you are planning for comes to play and everything suddenly becomes questionable. Why do you have to do this, why not that? In most of the cases, you have to decide all these alone, because as an immigrant, your family members in several hundred and thousands of kilometres away will never understand the intricacies of this little, but highly important decisions of your daily existence.
It took time for me to get used to this kind of, let say “growing up”. And once I was able to enjoy the freedom of making my own choices, no matter how unwise they might have appeared to some other persons, I fully embraced it and continue to build on it as my own way of life.
You see, life will never roll out a master plan for you. You can choose to follow the crowd, which is a much easier way to live for most people, or you can spend a good amount of your time alone, figuring out where you want to go and how to get there. Yes, you need to spend sometimes alone and be used to your own company.
As once said by Tiziano Terzani, an Italian journalist, and writer, “The only real teacher is not in a forest, or a hut or an ice cave in the Himalayas, it is within us.”
I hope you take the words of Tiziano to heart because for me they are of great value.
Now, the following are some of the ways to embrace solitude and take advantage of it for your peace of mind.
Learn To Love Yourself
Yes, this is the very first of the ways to embrace solitude and take advantage of it. If you are going to stay in your own company, it’s very important that you first love yourself. The truth is that it’s not always easy for most people to accept and love themselves. That is how many people live their lives. Rather sad but it is true.
One thing you will gain in being alone is that you will begin to really get used to yourself, know your personal characters, your strengths and your weaknesses, in the same way, you know of other people. To be okay with being alone, learn to love yourself, and be comfortable with your own company.
Define “Your Own Time”
At the end of the day, it’s really up to you to define your own time alone and what you do at that time. It’s about honouring yourself, your well-being, and your happiness. So, it’s up to you to define what all these mean to you.
Is it taking a long bath with some essential oils, having a walk in nature, lying in bed with some relaxing music, meditating, or reading a book with a nice cup of tea? Do whatever you want to set you up in this prime time.
You are the celebrity of the moment and only you can define what this “Time” really means to you.
Schedule Your Time For Your Things
Repetition, as they say, is the mother of all learning. For you to cultivate this new habit, you need to schedule the time in a day to repeat your lone moments. Whether it is meditating, painting, writing, or anything that you don’t usually have time to do in your busy hours of the days.
Remember that the decision to deliberately stay alone is not only to rest but also to recharge your energy and know yourself more. So, you need to prioritize the things that help you recharge your energy in your solitude.
I know that the idea of putting yourself first in your schedules of things might sound to some people as a taboo. But it’s not supposed to be so. In the previous article, I talked about the idea of taking care of yourself that you cannot serve others if you cannot serve yourself, and I meant every word I said. So, learn to place your priorities, your happiness, and your life goals on the top list, because no one will take care of you if you neglect yourself and your happiness.
If you feel lost sometimes or constantly get caught up in problems that you cannot resolve, no matter how hard you try. You might need to take a break from the noise outside and look deeper inside yourself. That might be the right time to explore yourself even more; the time to tap into your inner potentials you might not know you have right now.
As you do these at every given opportunity, you begin to know yourself more and more. This is how to embrace the Power of Solitude for Self-Discovering and this is all we can take from it today’s discussion. Talk to you next time.
How To Renew Yourself With The Power Of Solitude
Welcome to the continuation of our monthly discussion on the power of solitude. If this is your first video in the series, make sure you see the previous ones, so you can get the full detail of our discussion.
Today, things are moving faster than ever before and our control over our situations is gradually been stressed beyond the limit. The internet has made it possible for us and our thoughts to travel the world in a fraction of a second. With all these changes, there are mounting pressures we face every day, the concern now is how do we retake control over our lives?
This is the age of information overload, and we do not know yet what the actual consequences of this will be in the long term.
In my view, in my thinking, this high speed in our lives today may be comparable to a computer that is frozen with too much information to elaborate, and one of the best solutions is usually to restart the computer. This is how we come to the power of solitude, a deliberate decision to stay away from the noise and over-speed in our lives, so we can experience a sort of reset, renew our minds and recharge our energy.
At this point, you might be comfortable, interchanging the words “solitude” and “loneliness”, but as we have discussed in our earlier article on this argument, the two are not exactly the same. In a general sense of things, loneliness is a negative state, marked by a sense of isolation, where one feels that something is missing. You might have heard some people saying things like, “there is a crowd around me but I still feel lonely”. That is not what we are talking about here.
Solitude, in most of the cases, is deliberately created for self-regeneration and to find a deeper meaning in one’s life. It helps to redirect your attention to your inside, the very depth of you, and your inner richness.
Imagine yourself seated in front of a flowing stream of water with nothing around you, but just the flowing water, the sound of birds, insects, and the water. Imagine the serenity, the sensation, and the peace of mind. Solitude is a means of enjoying the quiet state of mind that helps you draw inspiration and sustenance from the world around you. It is the fullness of richness, something beyond what you can explain.
Solitude is something that you can cultivate and it’s refreshing like the stream water; a time to renew yourself and recharge your energy. Now, let’s see some of the ways you can Renew Yourself with the Power of Solitude. I mean the true advantages of your solitary moments.
Reboot Your Brain
This is one of the main advantages you get when you are alone. It is true that spending time alone helps your brain to regain its strength and vivacity. In his book, “The 20-Minute Break” Ernest Rossi, a psychotherapist wrote about what he calls the Ultradian Healing Response.
This, according to different experts, is based on our body’s ultradian rhythm, a recurrent period or cycle repeated throughout a 24-hour day. See it as a kind of the body’s natural waking and resting cycle – roughly 90 minutes of activity, followed by some 20 minutes of rest.
“Essentially, the brain cannot perform well after 90 minutes without a break. Pushing through actually makes you much less productive and drains your energy. Taking a 20-minute timeout after every 90 minutes of activity can not only refresh you but also allows you to come back to what you were doing with greater clarity and attention.”
What this is basically demonstrating is that taking a break from the noising world into a quiet place all by yourself, even for a short period of time can be very vital for your productivity and your peace of mind. It helps you to reboot your brain.
It’s Ok Just to Relax
It is very common for most of us to fill up our days with activities. At any little space available, we are dragged here and there by other people, and in most of the cases to satisfy exigencies outside our own needs. And all these plus the miseducation of the media compel us to live a life of superficiality and follow the followers, without ever knowing why.
Why don’t we just relax sometimes without feeling guilty for not accomplishing anything particular at that moment?
As remarked by Thomas Moors, “Nothing in our culture or in our education teaches us how to go inward, how to steady the mind and calm our attention.”
“Many of us,” said in an article (Why You Must Have Time Alone) feel compelled to measure our success in terms of acquisition and accomplishment. But even women who are unwilling to buy into such a narrow definition of success may feel uncomfortable with the idea of claiming time just for themselves, with no agenda whatsoever.”
It can be a perfect argument that we have become machines by our current systems. We have learned to take advantage of the speed and almost perfect in everything we do. We have been able to challenge everything we see or imagine, and the very idea of impossibility is now, almost, questionable. But something is been neglected and we need to claim it. It’s our humanity, our being humans with permission to make mistakes. Let’s accept it that it is ok to simply rest. It is ok to detach ourselves from all the little gadgets and electronics that keep our lives in a constant loop of want and connectivity.
Yes, it’s ok to take out time just to rest, so we can renew ourselves and refocus our purpose of living.
Learn to Connect with Nature
One of the best ways to renew yourself with the Power of Solitude is to connect with nature. We are products of nature, so it’s normal that we learn to tap into the natural forces each and every other time. It’s like going back to the origins, and it leads to self-regeneration.
Like in the previous quote from Thomas Moors, don’t expect the people or the systems to do this for you. It is your duty to know what you want and go for it.
This will be particularly beneficial if much of your day is spent indoors or at a computer and other electronic devices. Nature is powerful and it can help you regenerate yourself. To do this, you don’t necessarily need to travel to the Amazon jungle or the Himalayas mountains.
In the city where you live, there might be some green space, farmlands little mountains or a river nearby. Going to have a walk in those natural places are in themselves a rich therapy for you. And this therapy can help reduce your stress and at the same time increase your states of relaxation, peace of mind, and happiness.
If really you want to take advantage of your solitude and regenerate yourself in the process, nature is your best bet and if you start tapping into it today, it’s not too late. This article has been about how to renew yourself with the Power of Solitude and this is all we can take from it today.
Please do let me know if this series of articles have been beneficial to you in any way? The next and concluding part in the series is “how to walk alone sometimes”. Make sure you check it out.
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