Overcoming Pain: Valerie Lomari’s Journey from Trauma to Advocacy

Growing up in Nigeria, Valerie Lomari’s grandmother was the only source of love in her life. Raised in Lagos by her grandmother, Valerie’s early years were marked by hardship and a lack of familial support. At the tender age of 11, her world was shattered by the death of her grandfather, and she was uprooted to live with relatives in a new city. Instead of finding solace, Valerie was thrust into a life of servitude, feeling abandoned and alone.

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A Nightmare Unfolds: The Trauma of Female Genital Mutilation

At 16, Valerie’s world turned upside down when her grandmother, the sole pillar of love in her life, betrayed her trust. What was supposed to be a holiday turned into a nightmare as Valerie was subjected to the brutal practice of female genital mutilation (FGM).

The pain, both physical and emotional, was indescribable as Valerie grappled with the realization that her own grandmother had orchestrated this heinous act.

What is female genital mutilation?

Female genital mutilation (FGM) is a deeply entrenched cultural practice that involves the partial or total removal of external female genitalia or other injury to the female genital organs for non-medical reasons.

It is considered a form of gender-based violence and a violation of the fundamental human rights of girls and women. FGM is often performed on young girls, ranging from infancy to adolescence, and can have profound physical, psychological, and sexual health consequences that last a lifetime.

Beyond its immediate physical harm, FGM perpetuates harmful gender norms and reinforces unequal power dynamics within communities, serving as a tool for the control and subjugation of women and girls.

The eradication of FGM requires comprehensive efforts encompassing education, advocacy, and legal reform to challenge entrenched cultural beliefs and ensure the protection and empowerment of girls and women worldwide.

Silence and Shame: A Secret Burden

Carrying the weight of her trauma, Valerie kept the horrors of her experience hidden, drowning in shame and self-blame. It wasn’t until she met Tony, her future husband, that she found the courage to break her silence.

Despite her fears of rejection, Tony’s unwavering support provided Valerie with a glimmer of hope and the strength to confront her past.

With Tony’s encouragement, Valerie embarked on a journey of healing and advocacy. Despite the physical and emotional scars that FGM left behind, Valerie refused to let her past define her.

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She found solace in her role as a mother and channeled her pain into a mission to eradicate FGM and support survivors.

From Victim to Victor: Empowering Others

Valerie’s resilience knows no bounds as she tirelessly works to empower FGM survivors and raise awareness about this barbaric practice. Through her organization, Women of Grace, Valerie provides a safe haven for survivors, offering support, counseling, and education.

Her advocacy knows no bounds, from speaking engagements at the United Nations to grassroots initiatives in her community.

Women of Grace is a UK-based survivor-led organization, which advocates against the practice of Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting (FGM/C) and all forms of Gender-Based Violence (GBV). They do this by educating the public about the lasting consequences and harms of FGM.

Through grassroots initiatives, the organization engages with the community via workshops, talks, and activities to raise awareness and provide support services for those affected by FGM/C and abuse.

With a commitment to inclusivity, Women of Grace offers unrestricted support to women and girls dealing with trauma from FGM, empowering them to recognize signs of abuse and access help, irrespective of their background, religion, or race.

A Voice for Change: Breaking the Cycle of Silence

In a world where FGM is shrouded in secrecy and shame, Valerie’s voice rings out loud and clear. She refuses to be silenced, using her own pain as a catalyst for change.

By sharing her story, Valerie not only honors her own journey but amplifies the voices of countless survivors who have suffered in silence.

Valerie’s story serves as a poignant reminder of the urgent need to address the root causes of FGM and break the cycle of silence and shame.

Education emerges as a powerful tool in combating this harmful practice, as Valerie tirelessly advocates for awareness and understanding within both migrant communities and broader society.

Cultural Sensitivity and Community Engagement

Navigating the complex terrain of cultural norms and traditions requires a delicate balance of cultural sensitivity and unwavering commitment to human rights. Valerie’s approach to advocacy is grounded in community engagement, fostering open dialogue, and understanding while challenging harmful practices.

Access to Healthcare and Support Services

For survivors of FGM, access to healthcare and support services is essential in their journey towards healing and recovery.

Valerie’s work highlights the importance of breaking down barriers to care and ensuring that survivors receive the support and resources they need to reclaim their lives.

As Valerie looks towards the future, she is committed to empowering future generations with the knowledge and tools to prevent FGM.

By advocating for comprehensive sex education and promoting gender equality, Valerie hopes to create a world where every child can grow up free from the threat of FGM.

As you read this story, see Valerie’s journey from victim to victor as a powerful testament to the resilience of the human spirit. Through her unwavering determination and boundless compassion, Valerie has transformed her pain into power, leaving an indelible mark on the fight against FGM.

Transform your pain as a Victims of Female Genital Mutilation

If you are in the position, please provide support for survivors is essential in catalyzing social transformation to eradicate Female Genital Mutilation (FGM). This could also include, establishing safe environments conducive to open dialogue as a pivotal role in this process. Now, here are three self-empowerment recommendations:

Education and Awareness:

Victims of Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) can retain their voice and empower themselves by educating themselves about their rights and the consequences of FGM.

By gaining knowledge about the harmful effects of FGM and understanding that it is a violation of their fundamental human rights, victims can speak out confidently against the practice.

Additionally, raising awareness within their communities and advocating for change can help victims reclaim their voices and challenge the social norms that perpetuate FGM.

Access to Support Services:

Access to support services such as counseling, medical care, and legal assistance can empower victims of FGM to speak up and seek justice. These services provide victims with a safe space to share their experiences, process their trauma, and receive guidance on their rights and options.

Supportive networks and organizations specifically dedicated to FGM survivors offer solidarity, validation, and practical assistance, enabling victims to navigate their healing journey and assert their rights.

Community Engagement and Advocacy:

Victims of FGM can use their voices to effect change by engaging with their communities and advocating for policy reforms and social norm shifts.

By sharing their personal stories and raising awareness about the realities of FGM, victims can inspire empathy, challenge misconceptions, and mobilize support for efforts to eradicate the practice.

Active involvement in advocacy campaigns, public speaking engagements, and grassroots initiatives amplifies victims’ voices and positions them as agents of change in the fight against FGM.

Through collective action and advocacy, victims can contribute to creating a future where FGM is no longer tolerated or practiced.

Conclusion: A World Without FGM

As Valerie continues her tireless crusade to eradicate FGM, her story serves as a beacon of hope for survivors around the world.

Through her advocacy and activism, Valerie is leading the charge toward a future where FGM is relegated to the annals of history, and every individual is free to live a life of dignity and respect.

In Valerie’s vision, there is no place for pain, shame, or silence – only a world where love, compassion, and equality reign supreme.